Cold
by little-borgia
Summary: The heat goes out in Grayson Manor, forcing Conrad and Victoria to share a hotel room. Can they survive without killing each other?
1. Chapter 1

Conrad sighed heavily. Although no one could have predicted this he was positive his wife would place the blame on him. Maybe it was his fault. Maybe he let it happen by sheer forgetfulness. He threw a knit cable sweater over his shirt, not it did much to warm him up.

He crept into Victoria's room, letting the hallway light spread onto her carpet. He didn't want to wake her, but knew there was no other way around it. His reluctance was partially because of the way her mouth formed a soft smile in her sleep, as if her subconscious was the only time she allowed herself to be happy. But mostly, his reluctance stemmed from the knowledge that she would be irate at the news. She would be angry at him. Despite her constant rage towards him, he was always desperate to return to her good graces. In that aspect, he was no better than any other desperate Hamptonite.

"Victoria, wake up." He nudged, brushing the dark curls from her face. Her eyelids fluttered and when she first looked into his eyes a smile appeared on her face. The more lucid she became the quicker the smile faded.

"Conrad, it is the middle of the night!" She started, but worry set in as she sat up. "Is it the children? Is it you? What's happened?"

"It is nothing like that, my dear. Something happened to the heat pump..."

"The what?"

"The house has no heat." He stated, knowing she didn't know much about the maintenance of the house. He wasn't sure if it was his words or the truth of it, but Victoria crossed her arms in a weak attempt to warm herself up.

"Are they fixing it?"

"Not until the morning. I made us a room at the South Fork Inn. We can't stay here." He said. He knew she'd be angry they he only booked one room, but the point of their second marriage was to look the part. Separate rooms would ruin all they've worked for.

"We have to go now, Victoria." He repeated. He was grateful that Victoria agreed, excusing herself to go get dressed. As she walked off he couldn't help but wonder if she hadn't heard that they'd be sharing a room or if she hadn't minded.


	2. Chapter 2

Standing in the lobby of the South Fork Inn, Victoria prayed that no one noticed her. In a hurry she had thrown on a pair of jeans and a green cardigan, with a pair of flats. She usually preferred heels, but 2 a.m. was too early for heels. She had also preferred to get ready but the house was so cold that she threw her hair into a messy bun and grabbed the biggest pair of sunglasses she could find. She hadn't thought much of it until she had to stand in the hotel lobby, realizing how awful she truly looked. It irritated her how handsome Conrad looked. Unlike her, he could throw on jeans and a thick sweater and look handsome. She sometimes forgot how sexy Conrad could be, especially now as she watched him lose his temper at the young front desk attendant who kept telling him that they were cleaning the room.

"If that room isn't clean, find us another one. It is very late and my wife is very tired. I called ahead to prevent this type of incompetence!" Conrad yelled. Victoria always thought he was more attractive when he got protective over her. Sure it could be annoying, but it was also very, very sexy.

She sighed, trying to shake the feelings out of her head. Nothing good ever came from mending things with Conrad and she refused to learn that lesson again. She forced herself to consider Conrad's fault in all of this until she had convinced herself that he was to blame. After all, what kind of a man didn't keep the equipment up to date. Surely they could afford a heating pump. She rolled her eyes, thinking that Conrad probably did all of this because he'd be able to capture her and keep her locked up in one small room. And not just any room, probably the same room that he had cheated on her with Lydia or Ashley or any other nameless tramp desperate for his money.

"Our room is ready," Conrad said, putting his hand on the small of her back. She huffed, but followed him silently.

"You can't be serious," she started as soon as she saw the single bed in the room.

"I can't fathom the notion that you expected two twin sized beds, Victoria. We're married, remember? Quite happily, I've been told." Conrad said, wiggling his ring finger towards her face.

"I'm sure you're loving all of this. No wonder you didn't keep tabs on the heater-"

"Heating pump." Conrad corrected, knowing that behind the sunglasses was an icy glare with his name on it.

"This is probably an elaborate hoax to get me into your hotel room." She huffed. She took her glasses off, looking around the room. She silently prayed that by tomorrow she'd be back in her room.

"Let me assure you that this is in no way my version of paradise. And if I did intend to plan to get you into a hotel room, I would have opted for a fire instead of breaking the heat. With the ice that runs through your veins I'm surprised you even noticed the shift in temperature." Conrad grabbed his bag and headed into the bathroom to change.

Inside, he knew he shouldn't have said those things. He had never met another person who could aggravate him the way Victoria did. He didn't know what it was about her, but no matter what he tried to tell himself, he couldn't just let things go. He knew that Victoria felt the same. That's why their relationship worked so perfectly. Or so disfunctionally he could never tell. Neither could ever let the other have the last word. He didn't hear anything from the other room and wondered if Victoria had fallen asleep. As a precaution, he opened the door as quietly as he could.

In the other room he saw Victoria. He tried to look away, but he couldn't. Her back was turned to him as she unhooked her bra, exposing her bare back. He watched as she ran a hand across her cheek occasionally. Was she crying? Had he done that? His thoughts were interrupted as she peeled off her jeans. Even from behind, she was breathtaking. Not because she was standing in front of him in a lacy pair of purple panties, but because while she could irritate him constantly, she could make him fall in love with her all over again. She didn't have to say anything. He didn't have to see her face. Just her presence was enough to make his heart skip a beat. She sniffled quietly as she tossed a black silk nightgown over her head, letting the hem of it fall to the middle of her thigh. She pulled the hair tie out of her hair, letting the dark ringlets fall around her face.

Conrad cleared his throat, letting her know he was behind her as he moved towards the bed. She sipped the glass of water by the nightstand and Conrad noticed the unmistakable pink on the tip of her nose. He was crushed at the realization that he had undoubtably made her cry. A flood of memories hit him, making him wonder what other actions of his had broken her.

"Victoria, I didn't mean what I said earlier. I was just tired." He offered.

"Being tired must be the only thing we have in common. I suggest we get some sleep." She said, turning off the lamp on her nightstand.

Conrad turned his light off as he crawled into bed. He wanted more than anything to hold her. To connect with her again. And yet he was frozen in fear. He feared that she would reject him. But he also feared that she wouldn't and once again, he would hurt her. She was so fragile and somehow whenever she was in his hands he dropped her, making her shatter in a different and more disastrous way than before.


	3. Chapter 3

About two hours after falling asleep, Conrad awoke to a shuffling. It took his eyes a minute to adjust to the darkness, but he could soon make out Victoria. She must have been doing some sort of exercise. He let himself enjoy staring at her behind as she lunged from one side to the other; bent down to touch her toes and slowly rose.

"Victoria it's the middle of the night!" Conrad finally said, making her jump. He turned on the light. She wore tight black pants and a teal tank top. He silently wondered why she didn't wear teal more often. Even in gym clothes she looked radiant.

"It's not night. It's 4:30," she corrected, tossing her hair in a high ponytail.

"What on Earth are you doing?"

"I'm going for a jog." She stated. From the expression on her face, this was nothing new.

"Since when do you jog?"

"Do you remember about 25 years ago? I got pregnant and gained so much weight and then we brought a baby boy home from the hospital? Since then." She said, letting a playfulness seep into her tone. Conrad resisted the urge to tell her that in actuality she barely gained any weight because to this day she still got worked up over it. If he started a fight over it he was sure they'd end up arguing over how much weight she lost during her pregnancy with Charlotte. He blamed her and she blamed him for the David Clarke fiasco and they would never see eye to eye on it.

"It's dark." Conrad stated.

"Conrad, I go for a jog at 4:30. Every day." Her voice was clipped. She liked her routine and running cleared her head.

"My dear, there is a big difference between jogging around Grayson Manor and jogging all around the city." She let out a sigh, but he didn't care. All it would take is one person crossing her path at the wrong time. She was so well known it would be easy for someone to kidnap her, or worse. As angry as she was, he wasn't going to risk her being beaten, raped or killed. He knew he was being overprotective but he didn't care.

"Conrad-" she started, but he was already getting up and grabbing something from his bag. As he headed to the bathroom he looked back at her.

"I'll stay behind you and out of your way, but you aren't going alone."

She hated to admit it, but it was sweet that he was so protective. Of course, it didn't begin to excuse what he said last night. But that was how they worked. He'd say the cruelest things and then make the sweetest actions. She liked to think she was the same, but a part of her worried that she was only cruel towards him. Maybe that's why she told him that he could jog next to her, not behind her.

The jog was mostly silent, with the exception of Conrad's jagged breathing. She was pleased at the notion that she was in better shape than he was, although she always suspected it. What she hadn't expected was to find him so irresistible soaked in sweat. The thought made her nervously wipe her forehead, wondering if he found her attractive in the same circumstance. She shook the thought out of her head. He barely noticed her dressed up, let alone when she was sweaty. Conrad, however had spent his jog formulating a plan. He decided that they would upgrade most of the Manor, which would require a lengthy stay at the South Fork Inn. But he also thought of a sure fire way to get closer to Victoria, even if only for a few minutes.

The minute they got back into the hotel room, Conrad ripped his clothes off and jumped into the shower as he yelled "dibs." Victoria stared at the shower, dumbfounded.

"Conrad, I need in there!" She whined. They both knew she'd go crazy standing around soaked in sweat.

"There's room for two, my dear." Conrad called from the shower. She sighed, suddenly aware of what he was doing. She wasn't sure which was worse, being sweaty or being so close to Conrad.

"Please?!" She whimpered. In the shower Conrad smiled. It was too easy. A part of him felt bad. He knew that it was taking all she had to go those couple seconds without getting cleaned. Panic crept in, making him worry that she'd chose to wait for a shower.

"Turn around," Victoria said quietly. He complied although he thought she was being silly. They had seem one another before, but he didn't want to spook her. He waited until she gave permission for him to open his eyes. He made a weak excuse about needing the body wash and turned towards her. He quickly looked her up and down, marveling at how well she had aged. When he leaned towards her, they locked eyes. Neither moved or spoke, they just looked at each other as if really seeing the other. Victoria forgot how gorgeous Conrad's eyes were. She let her hand touch his cheek gently. He inched closer and she knew he was going to kiss her. She wanted him to kiss her. But instead she panicked.

"I need to wash my hair." She stood in silence, watching Conrad leave the shower. She couldn't tell if she had made a wise choice or a mistake.

After he dried off, Conrad quietly called his maintenance man, Jerry. He set his plan into action. Now he just had to break the news to Victoria.


	4. Chapter 4

Conrad and Victoria stood at opposite ends of the hotel room, watching the housekeeper clean the broken glass.

"I apologize. The pitcher must have slipped out of my wife's hand." Conrad offered.

"As well as the four glasses." The housekeeper mumbled.

"My husband is more than willing to pay for any damage." Victoria offered. She smiled at the housekeeper but glared when her eyes locked with Conrad.

She lost her temper, she could admit it. Throwing the pitcher should have been enough, but she like the way the water painted itself onto the walls with every glass she smashed. She refused to take complete blame because if anything it was his fault. Everything had been fine between them. He insisted on jogging with her and then they showered together. After that, Conrad did it again. Like a rattlesnake, he struck.

He brought it up so casually that she thought it was a twisted sense of humor at first. He had decided to pull a "one and done" with the Manor. Instead of fixing the heat, Conrad now wanted to update the water heater, replace the shingles on the roof and some other so-called "minor" repairs. Basically, Conrad told her that they'd be locked up in this small hotel room until further notice.

So she threw the pitcher against the wall. Followed by the glasses.

"Was that absolutely necessary?" Conrad asked once the housekeeper had left.

"Absolutely." Victoria snapped. She hated when Conrad refused to admit that it was all his fault.

"As I already told you, it's better to get everything taken care of at the same time. Unless you like being dragged out of bed in the middle of the night."

"How do I know this isn't some elaborate scheme to keep me locked up?"

"You just ran 5 miles out and 5 miles back! That's hardly being held hostage. And I can assure you that being confined to this hotel room is no day at the park."

"What does that mean?" She demanded.

"You make everything difficult. You are mean. You are cold. Sharing a bed with you is comparable to staying at the Manor without heat. No wonder they call you the ice queen." He said before he could stop himself.

"Who calls me that?" She said quietly, trying to calm the trembling in her voice.

"Everyone does, Victoria. The house staff, people in town, the kids-"

"And you?" He could see the tears building in her eyes. He regretted saying what he did, and like always he couldn't stop himself before he broke her heart.

"Vic-"

"Do you call me the ice queen? Yes or no?"

"Yes." Conrad said with a sigh. He watched helplessly as one tear trailed down her cheek. She tried desperately to shut off her emotions. He knew if it weren't for him standing there she would have broken down by now. Sometimes he wished he didn't love her as much as he did because he was sure there was someone out there who wouldn't hurt her as often as he did.

"If we're staying here for a few more days I'll need to pick up some necessities." She said, her voice breaking as she reached in her purse for her keys.

In a flash she was off, desperate to get away from Conrad, even if it was just for a little while. As he watched her walk away, Conrad knew he needed to figure out a way to make it up to Victoria before she walked away for good.


	5. Chapter 5

Victoria considered it a victory that she was able to give her order to the fast food worker without crying. She had sat in the parking lot of the South Fork Inn, crying hysterically with her head resting on the steering wheel. Conrad had said much harsher things to her, but it still hurt that Conrad considered her to be icy. Despite the bumps in their marriage, she felt that she had shown Conrad more of herself than anyone else. Almost anyone else.

She had stopped for lunch, choosing to drown her sorrows in a bacon cheeseburger, onion rings and vanilla milkshake. She stayed in the car, eating and crying until she had calmed herself down.

But now, walking around the store she felt sick. She wasn't used to eating such unhealthy food and now she felt queasy. Her cart was filled with things that she thought they would need at the hotel. She was tempted to get towels and things for her and force Conrad to fend for himself, but at the last minute she changed her mind. Plus shopping always made her feel a little bit better.

Afterwards, she still wasn't ready to go back and face Conrad, so she decided to shop for herself. And if she happened to stumble upon some sexy nightgowns or dresses cut shorter than she usually wore them so be it. Just because she wasn't planning on giving in to Conrad didn't mean she couldn't show him what she was missing. She smiled to herself, silently praising herself for such a good idea as she walked into the store.

Back at the South Fork Inn, Conrad had grown increasingly worried. Victoria had been gone all day. She hadn't answered any of his calls. He had no one to keep tabs on her. He was worried that something happened to her, but also afraid of calling the police. Had she left him for good? Did he push her too hard? Now more than ever he was aware that he needed to make things right with her.


	6. Chapter 6

Victoria tried to deny the look of relief that swept over Conrad's face when she walked into the hotel room. She immediately noticed the lilies on the table, but was in no mood to express her gratitude.

"Victoria, I was worried something happened to you. You didn't answer your phone." Conrad said, attempting to put his arms on her shoulders. She instinctively stepped back and he knew it was to escape his touch.

"I had nothing to say to you."

They were interrupted by a knock at the door. The hotel attendant brought her bags up, placing them along the bed and carefully lying the dresses flat on the bed. When he left, Victoria immediately started unpacking the bags.

"Retail therapy?" Conrad asked.

"We needed things since I only packed for one night. That was the plan, remember?" She said, chucking a lush towel at him.

"The hotel has towels."

"Then give it back." She said, inching closer to him. "I mean it. You use those flat towels that who knows has used and I'll use these new, fluffy ones." He had only meant it as a joke, but he knew her defenses were already up.

"I was kidding. It's very thoughtful."

Victoria rolled her eyes, but said nothing as she moved to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

Once she was in the shower, Conrad sat down and rubbed his temples. He had expected her to still be upset, but he thought she would have cooled off a little. He took a chance, ordering room service for the two of them. He wondered if that would be enough to appease her. His thoughts were interrupted by the unmistakable smell of her apple shampoo. That had always been his favorite and it had been a while since she used it. He couldn't help but wonder if it was intentional.

Victoria hadn't intended to feel so guilty about her plan. She was surprised how big of a toll the memories were taking on her. The look in his eyes when she came home made her melt and she had to remind herself that if she was supposed to be an ice queen that she couldn't give in. Washing her hair, she couldn't help but think of the early years in their marriage. He would run his fingers through her hair, gripping and massaging the base of her neck as he held her close, inhaling the smell of her hair. She had giggled and tried to get away but now she would give anything to feel that needed and desired. She could feel herself getting choked up and crotchet down in the shower, letting the water hit her exposed back. She needed to do this. She needed to make Conrad suffer the way she was suffering.

Conrad dutifully hung each dress, imagining how the elegant fabrics and delicate details would look on his wife. He turned to find Victoria. She had a nightgown that was a much brighter shade of pink than she usually wore. The straps were so small that he couldn't help but fantasize about ripping both of them and watching the pink silk crumble down her chest. But it was the slit in the sides that held his attention. She didn't usually wear anything with slits and certainly not ones that slid this high up her thigh.

"Honestly, Conrad. It's just pajamas." She said, rolling her eyes as she moved to get a glass of water. She was thrilled at the way he looked at her, but surprised that it wasn't just because of revenge. Despite his many shortcomings, Conrad knew how to make her feel beautiful.

"Victoria, you look-" Conrad stammered, forcing her to give him an uneasy look.

"You aren't having a stroke or anything are you?"

"I think my heart just skipped a beat." He offered, but regretted his lame compliment when she rolled her eyes.

She didn't want to be around him, but she knew it was a part of the plan; so when Conrad inched closer, running his fingers through her hair, she let him. She allowed herself the simple pleasure of closing her eyes, reveling in his attention. He let himself bury his head in her hair, intoxicated by the scent as much as her beauty. He moved his hands, running them up and down her arms as his mouth in he'd closer to her ear.

"You look incredible." He whispered directly into her ear. He could hear the changes in her breathing but she didn't say anything.

"I'm sorry about earlier. I-"

"Don't." She said, her voice both harsh and hurt in a combination that broke his heart.

"I didn't mean it." He said, moving so she was forced to meet his gaze. She knew she needed to respond but couldn't string any group of sentences together. Luckily for her, there was a knock at the door.

"Who is it?" Conrad gruffed. He knew if they were interrupted he would lose this moment with her.

"Room service." The voice at the other end of the door. He didn't want to answer but Victoria was already moving away from him, so he grabbed the door.


	7. Chapter 7

After dinner, Victoria pushed the armchair close to the window and opened her book.

"I'm sorry it isn't your balcony." Conrad had meant it but she assumed he was being sarcastic.

"It's fine, Conrad."

Victoria went back to her book, but Conrad couldn't tear his gaze away. She crossed her legs, which enhanced the slit in her nightgown. She wiggled her foot and Conrad was mesmerized by the way her manicured toes jiggled around. But mostly, he was fascinated by the way her eyes lit up at certain parts of her book and the way she'd smile or frown as she read. Her reactions made him wish she was reading aloud so he could be a part of whatever was affecting her so deeply.

"You're gawking," she said, closing her book to look at him. He stuttered for a moment, unable to speak. He hadn't anticipated her calling him out on it. Usually she just let him watch her.

"My dear, you look exquisite. I couldn't look away." He was being honest but she didn't believe him. She never did.

"Well it's impossible to concentrate with you staring like that. Now I have to find something else to do."

"I'll stare no matter what you pick." She rolled her eyes, but was secretly agitated. She hated that he held so much power over her. He could make her feel so high one minute and so down the next. Most of all, she hated that she couldn't turn off her feelings for him, despite her many attempts. Dramatically she threw herself on the back, lying flat and staring at the ceiling.

"We could watch a movie," Victoria finally suggested. She hadn't anticipated wanting to spend time with Conrad. She couldn't be sure if she was bored enough to want his company or if once again he had gotten to her. She kept telling herself it was merely boredom, but either way she was nervous about the rest of their stay.

Conrad flipped through the channels, stopping on an old movie. Victoria was surprised by his choice.

"A place in the sun. Your favorite, right?"

"I can't believe you remember that, Conrad. "

"Of course I remember. You had the flu and were stuck in bed for days. We must have watched it a dozen times."

"And all I could stomach was wonton soup."

"One of the only times you've I've seen you eat Chinese!" They both broke into a fit of giggles as he joined her on the bed. He pulled her down so her head was rested on his chest.

"We did have some really great times, Vic." He said. Both of them were quiet for a moment, letting their current relationship sink in.

"Do you think we'll ever be like we used to be?" Victoria asked, but Conrad had thought the same.

"I don't think I'm the one to ask. I never thought we would be where we are now."

"Me either. I wish we could go back to how we used to be." Victoria said before she could stop herself.

Conrad stared at her a moment, dumbfounded. Had he imagined her saying that? He had spent years wishing she would want him as much as he wanted her.

"Let's do it!" He said.

"Do what?"

"Let's go back to how we were."

"It's not that simple, Conrad."

"It is. I love you. Always have. Always will. I like to think you loved me once-"

"I did. You know I did."

"So why can't we just pretend that things didn't change?" His voice was so hopeful that it broke her heart to think of saying no.

"Conrad, please don't do this..." Victoria slowly started to rise. She couldn't stop the tears from falling and she wasn't fast enough to move away from Conrad. He immediately jumped up, grabbing her waist with one hand and wiping her cheeks with the other.

"What?" He asked gently.

"I can't do this again, Conrad."

"Why?"

"Because you always manage to break my heart."


	8. Chapter 8

The classic movie channel had switched to paid programming, so Conrad sat, watching a cheesy infomercial for a top of the line blender. His arm had fallen asleep so long ago that he was in excruciating pain, but he refused to move. Victoria had fallen asleep hours ago. Her head was craned between his neck and his shoulder and her body was curled up in his lap. He used both hands to cradle her the way he cradled Charlotte when she fell asleep in his arms as a toddler.

He could have expected Victoria to be brutally honest, but he wasn't prepared for her tears. Being forced out of Grayson Manor hadn't been easy, and he hadn't helped by referencing her icy exterior. Twice in one day he had realized she was crying. But this, this was different.

Although she didn't turn down his advances, she admitted that he would break her heart. Naive as it was, he had never admitted even to himself that he was the blame for her guarded nature. Immediately after her confession she broke down. When standing proved too much, Victoria crotched down, setting her elbows on her knees and burying her head in her hands. Conrad stood, unable to do anything but listen to the muffled sobs. After almost an hour, she collapsed on the floor, unable to hold herself up any longer. It seemed like a pipe had burst inside her and she. Ow cried freely, unable to stop even if she had wanted to. Eventually, Conrad scooped her up and carried her to the small couch. He didn't try to talk to her or reason with her. He didn't even try to fix the problem as he often did. Instead, he spent the evening rubbing her back or stroking her hair as she cried uncontrollably. It took several hours, but like a small child she eventually cried herself out and fell asleep. Conrad planned on carrying her to the bed, but seeing her so relaxed in her sleep stopped him. He was willing to stay up all night if it helped prove his love for her.

Victoria slowly opened her eyes and squinted at the bright television screen. She didn't understand why Conrad would spend his evening watching an advertisement for some special towel. The memories of the evening came flooding back to her. Not only had she dodged Conrad's advances, she had a breakdown of sorts. Her head hurt from all the tears, but she was more embarrassed than anything.

"What time is it?" She asked, causing Conrad to jump.

"A little after 3, I believe. How do you feel?"

"Embarrassed," she said, running her fingers through her hair. She stood up, getting a glass of water. When Conrad stood, she could immediately tell her was sore from staying in one position for so long. Had he done that for her?

"No need to be embarrassed, my dear. You had every right to be upset. My behavior was deplorable and I apologize." She smiled at him but immediately began rummaging through her purse.

"This will help with the soreness." She said, dropping two pills into his palm. Her hands didn't shy away from his and before long her fingers were running across his hands and fingers. Conrad was overwhelmed by the blaze he felt at such an innocent touch. He resisted the urge to take control of the situation. Victoria had a way of reminding him of a feral cat. The secret to getting close to the cats was to let them come to you. Any type of sudden movement could spook them and force them to run away. After all these years, his wife still possessed the same qualities. He knew if he took control he would risk spooking her.

"Thank you for taking care of me. You didn't have to do all that." Victoria looked down as she spoke, obviously embarrassed. Conrad knew she wasn't a fan of wearing her heart on her sleeve, but he kind of enjoyed seeing that side of her. He assumed it was wishful thinking, but he thought (and hoped) that her breakdown was proof that she really loved him. If she didn't, she wouldn't have cared, right?

"I will always take care of you," she nodded her head, but continued looking down. Conrad used one finger to lift her chin, forcing eye contact. "Nothing will change that. Ever." Victoria suddenly noticed the stifled yawn from Conrad. She grabbed his hand, pulling him closer to her. Without her heels she had to stand on her tiptoe to kiss his cheek.

"You're tired," she whispered, leading him towards the bed.

"I'm worried about you. I can sleep anytime."

"Let's get some sleep. You have plenty of time to worry about me. After all, we'll be here at least a few more days, right?" She said, raising an eyebrow. For the first time she was actually grateful for the unexpected hotel stay.


	9. Chapter 9

At 4 a.m. Conrad forced one eye open, waiting for his wife to jump up, anxious for another jog. He watched the bright pink of her nightgown poke out from the blanket with her every breath. Satisfied she wasn't planning on going running in the dark, he drifted back to sleep. He woke up hours later, amazed that Victoria was still sound asleep. She was never much for sleeping in and yet it was after 9:30 and she hadn't tossed or turned once.

A little after 10, Victoria used her hand in a halfhearted attempt to block the sun. She glanced at the clock. 10:15. She closed her eyes and started drifting back to sleep when reality hit. Had she really slept that long? She was lucky if she got a full 8 hours of sleep and she had almost slept 12 hours. She jumped up towards the bathroom to splash water on her face.

She hadn't even heard the sound of the shower until she was in the bathroom. She had managed to forget that Conrad and her had shared a hotel room. Suddenly, the previous nights events came flooding back.

"Victoria? Is that you?" Conrad called from the shower. She was brushing her teeth and unable to answer him. He pulled he shower door open just as she was putting her toothbrush back.

"Good morning." As he spoke, he couldn't help but notice the way her eyes seemed to graze over every inch of him. "You look well rested. I'm glad." In the events of the previous night, Conrad had forgotten how sexy her nightgown was. The thin straps, the bright color and that tempting slit. Not only that, but her hair had naturally tousled itself, giving it added volume. She was irresistible.

"Conrad, I wanted to thank you-" she started, but gasped as he stepped out of the shower. One arm around her waist was all it took to pull her slender body into the shower.

"Conrad!" She shrieked. The water immediately hit her, turning the bright pink fabric a much darker shade that clung to every curve. Although she wasn't a fan of his methods, Victoria couldn't pretend the material didn't feel erotic on her soft skin.

"Why would you do that?" She tried to demand, but her shaky voice became more of a suggestion than a demand.

"Last night I proved to you I can be the tender, chivalrous type that you've certainly wanted. I didn't mind doing so; I actually loved every minute of it. But let's not pretend that I'm not still that ruthless businessman who will take what he wants." The way he looked at her forced the hairs on the back of Victoria's neck to stand on end. Usually she was put off by his advances. And yet not only did she not mind his declaration, she actually liked it. She hoped it was simply an after effect of last nights breakdown.

He ran his hands through her now tangled hair, letting his nails gently scratch her scalp. When he saw her eyes close, he invaded the space between them, gently sucking on the hollowed skin along her neck. He didn't need to open his eyes to realize that not only had Victoria not tensed up the way she usually did, she had inched closer to him, letting her hands travel from the back of his neck to his hair. She let a moan escape her lips as his hands traveled along her soaked nightgown. Conrad let his hands slide up her thigh, but instead of following her flesh they gripped the hem of the nightgown as he pulled it over her head. She seemed startled for a minute, suddenly self conscious of her bare body.

"You are beautiful" he growled before letting his lips collide with hers. Her tongue urgently begged for entrance into his. He quickly complied and the recollections came flooding back to Victoria. She had forgotten how his kiss tasted and the way their tongues danced with one another. She had forgotten the fire that was his touch and how he could make her feel like the only thing that mattered.

He let his hand roam directly up her leg, but every time he got close her legs shook and buckled. After the third or forth time he stopped with a sigh.

"I'm sorry. My knees keep buckling," she said, looking down sheepishly. She wasn't some shy schoolgirl and she couldn't understand why her body was reacting like this. This wasn't love, was it?

Without bothering to turn the water off, Conrad carried Victoria to the bed.

"You can't leave the water on!"

"It's fine, Vic."

"I'm chairing the Grayson Green Global fundraiser. You can't waste water like that! It's a real problem!" Although frustrating, he couldn't help but find her antics adorable. He often assumed that she did these fundraisers for show, but underneath it all Victoria was quite the philanthropist. He ran to the bathroom, shutting off the water before jumping into bed.

"Thank you." Victoria said, wrapping her legs around him and pushing him against her in a heated kiss.

He let his kiss wander lower and lower, nipping at different sections of her porcelain skin. She gripped parts of her hair, knowing where his destination would be. He plunged into her, making her gasp. He was eager to please her, to remind her of the passion they once shared. He reveled in the comfort being with her brought. After all these years, she was like a security blanket or a favorite pair of jeans. She could immediately make him feel how he had felt when they first entered into marriage. Back then, he was the luckiest man on Earth. His toughest decision was whether he was more proud of going into Grayson Global after finally gaining approval from his father or if he was more proud about coming home to his new wife, who was always anxious to hear even the most minor detail of his day. Of course, now he could clearly see that the latter choice was the most important one. He only wished he had realized it decades ago. Following his gentle rhythm, Victoria arched her back, using her hips to push herself closer to Conrad. He in turn dove even deeper into her, enjoying the whimpers that freely fell from her mouth. Before long, he felt her entire body shudder and he knew his work was done.

He was taken by surprise when Victoria grabbed his neck, forcing him into a kiss that he easily complied with. She had never been a fan of kissing him after he had pleased her in that way. She usually considered it unhygienic or classless. However, this time it was like she couldn't get enough of him.

Conrad was uneasy about initiating sex with Victoria. He knew they were clearly walking the same path, but he was worried that she would change her mind. He had made sure to take care of her first for that reason alone. And yet, as he slowly entered her, it became clear that she wanted this just as much - if not more- than he did. Her fingernails dug into his back and the way she repeated his name made him feel like she had just accepted her feelings towards him.

Victoria knew he was waiting for her to go first. She could tell by the way he teased her. One minute he was going full speed and the next he seemed to let it crawl in and out, causing her to catch her breath. She fought against herself, ignoring all the signs her body was sending her. She hadn't felt passion like this in such a long time and she didn't want to risk ending it. He leaned forward, gently nibbling on her earlobe. His hands held her hips as he dove deeper into her. She cried his name as she hit her wall and he quickly followed her lead.

He collapsed next to her, offering a small kiss on her shoulder.

"So, Mr. Ruthless Businessman, did you get what you wanted?" She asked once her breathing had steadied.

"Partly."

"Partly? I shudder to think what else you have your sights set on." She said as crazy scenarios started popping up in her mind. Conrad turned, looking her square in the eye.

"You. You're the only part." The sincerity in his blue eyes made her all too aware of the lump in her throat.

"I'm right here."

"No, not really. And I want all of you, Victoria. I want your fire and your ice. I want the sparkle in your eyes. I want your heart. I want your wit, your compassion. I want your love. I want all of you."

"We tried that," she said sadly. A highlight reel of the lows of their marriage played in her mind.

"I just want a second chance." Conrad was not ready to accept no.

"A second chance?!" She almost laughed. How many times had they tried again? They crashed and burned every time.

"No. I had one chance. And I blew it. I didn't deserve you after that. I probably didn't deserve you before that. But after that, we may have tried again but you never gave yourself to me. Not completely. I don't want the 'golden couple' image. I want the real thing."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. She knew he was right. She knew that after their first attempt at love fizzled she had given Conrad the image of her but not allowed herself to open her heart to him.

"Do you even think this would work? What if it doesn't?"

"Then we'll be where we are now. A marriage of convenience. What do we have to lose?"

Everything in Victoria's body told her to resist him, but her heart screamed for him. She knew that she'd regret it, but she sealed the deal with a kiss, pressing herself against him as hard as she could manage.


	10. Chapter 10

Conrad lead his wife towards the hot tub. It was sheer luck that the private jacuzzi had been unoccupied but Conrad used it to his advantage, paying extra to ensure that no one would disturb them. Things with Victoria were so different and new suddenly that he would pay any amount to prevent anything from spooking her.

"We'll have privacy here, I made sure of it." He told her as he pressed his hand to her lower back, leading her into the hot tub.

"Is that a trick you learned from your time with Lydia?" She asked. She didn't understand why the words spilled from her mouth. She hadn't wanted to, but at the same time she needed to know if he was serious about them being together.

"Victoria, you know Lydia couldn't go anywhere near water without worrying that the chemicals would turn her bottled blonde green." He said, gripping her hair. He had always loved that Victoria never pretended to be someone she wasn't. She didn't dye her hair or fall victim to any of the cosmetics procedures that so many women in the Hamptons did. He suspected that was one of the reasons she blew most women out of the water, because Victoria was always Victoria.

"So you learned this with Ashley." She pressed on, giving him a small laugh and a smile that showed both of her dimples.

Conrad sat down, grabbing his wife's hips and pulling her down so she was straddling him.

"I know what you're doing, but you're wasting your time." He said calmly.

"And what, pray tell am I doing?" She asked.

"You're poking the bear. You finally let me in and now you're scared and vulnerable. If you provoke me and I lash out then you kill two birds with one stone. You will be able to say you opened your heart to me and that although it didn't work, it was my fault it failed. It's pointless though, I'm not giving up on you. I learned that lesson one too many times." She scoffed, but she wasn't really mad. He was right, and they both knew it. As always, she had been testing him. But this time felt so different. Their old fights usually boiled down to one distinct difference between them. Conrad had been unfaithful, but had never given his heart to anyone besides her. Victoria, on the other hand had. It both angered and hurt to realize that when it came to infidelity, she was the worst offender.

"So you think you have some sixth sense about me now?" She asked. A part of her wanted to be angry with him, but she just didn't have it in her. She was tired of pushing him away.

"I don't pretend to have a sixth sense. What I do have, however is a Vic sense." He wiggled his eyebrows at her, obviously proud of his joke. She rolled her eyes at him. His joke was in no way funny, but it was touching.

"You're crazy."

"Crazy for you." He grabbed her hips and pressed her further down, forcing her to feel exactly how he felt about her. "See what you do to me?" He expected her to be offended, maybe even slap him. Instead she grabbed the back of his neck, desperately pressing her lips to his. She ran her tongue across his lower lip. He couldn't help but assume he had said or done something right, because she was urgent for his touch. It reminded him of their first time together. No matter how much time had lapsed since then, he could never forget how urgent everything was to her. It was as if she were racing, not to get it over with but to experience the entire thing. Years later, when she had explained what she had suffered through at the hands of her stepfather he realized that her urgency was her trying to work past it, to wipe the slate clean in a way. Of course, it wasn't until a few years ago that she had explained what Jimmy had done to her. He had been horrified. It also deeply ashamed that she hadn't told him in their years together. It made her urgency their first night even more heartbreaking.

She glanced around nervously, wanting to make sure no one would stumble upon them. Although they had a reputation for being the "golden couple," she didn't want anyone catching them.

"I paid for privacy, my dear. You don't have to keep looking over your shoulder. But if you're worried we can go back to the room-" Victoria glanced around nervously, but moved her hands to untie her husbands swimming trunks. As she kissed him, she pushed her swimsuit to the side, muffling his moans with a kiss and she lowered herself onto him.

Conrad couldn't believe his wife's take charge attitude. He couldn't believe how exciting it was that her bathing suit was still on. They both tried half heartedly to muffle the moans as she pushed him deeper and deeper into her until neither could take it any longer. Afterwards, she let her forehead rest against his chest. She made no attempt to fix the ebony strands that fell against both sides of her face. Even after all this time, she was embarrassed. She wasn't the type to act so impulsively and she couldn't even blame Conrad. This had been entirely her fault. She had taken exactly what she wanted, when she wanted it.

"No need to be bashful," Conrad said as he rubbed her shoulders. He was actually grateful for their troubled past because he know had a much better understanding of what Victoria both wanted and needed.

"What do you say we go back to the room and get ready?"

"Ready for what?" She asked, finally looking up. He could still see the pink flush that had spread across her face.

"My dear, I'm taking you out tonight." He said as they got out of the hot tub.


	11. Chapter 11

Victoria wrinkled her nose as she saw their destination. She was no stranger to the Mexican restaurant but she had always assumed it was a secret place. It wasn't fancy or exclusive. In actuality, they just had really amazing tacos. But she never mentioned it and had assumed like so many things, it was a secret to her family, especially Conrad.

"What is this?" She asked as they walked towards the door. She clung to the last shred of hope that this was a bizarre coincidence. She didn't think she could stand if he knew her secrets. It made her feel vulnerable and there was nothing Victoria hated more than being vulnerable.

"We both know you know what this is," Conrad replied. He had never pretended not to keep close tabs on his wife. He knew that when she was feeling down she came here. He also knew that she kept it secret, always paying with cash to prevent it from showing on any credit card statements. She was clever, but he was one step ahead of her. After the David Clarke fiasco he had kept her closely monitored. It started as a way to protect his image and his family but the further they drifted, the more it served as a way to feel close to her.

Over the years, Conrad had uncovered more things by keeping tabs on Victoria than by communicating with her. That was how he learned that Leslie Williams had dropped a twenty pound weight on Victoria's foot at the gym. Since he wasn't supposed to know, Conrad had taken extreme measures, convincing Lydia to take Victoria on a "spa retreat" where the resort employees had been given intense directions and Victoria had unknowingly been treated by a doctor. Of course, back in the Hamptons, Conrad had used that time to destroy the Williams family.

It was also how he realized how much Victoria loved Abuelos. Although he wasn't a big fan of Mexican he had frequented the restaurant a few times, sampling different items and trying to pinpoint what his wife would order there.

Victoria was about to argue with Conrad and deny ever stepping foot into the establishment, but before she could say a word the host greeted her by name.

"Hola, Miss Victoria!"

"I'm sure it was a lucky guess." Conrad grumbled, enjoying the crimson on Victoria's cheeks. She frowned at Conrad, but quickly smiled at the young hostess.

"Hello, Marianna. I'd like to introduce you to my husband, Conrad."

Victoria placed her hand on Conrad's shoulder and he instinctively shook the hostess' hand.

"You have the sweetest wife. She saved my son's after school program all by herself." Conrad turned to Victoria, raising his eyebrows. She certainly was full of surprises.

"It was. Nothing. One quick phone call to inform the superintendent of some of the tax write-offs for those programs. It was nothing."

"It was something to me." Marianna said as she grabbed two menus and lead them to a cozy corner booth. Victoria thanked her, squeezing her hand before sliding into the booth. Afterwards, Victoria tried looking at the menu but she could feel Conrad's eyes on her.

"What?" She said without looking up.

"You're full of surprises, Vic."

"I said it was nothing. One phone call."

"Give yourself more credit. Some of the top guys in the office don't even know what a tax write-off is let alone be able to specifically pinpoint one-"

"Seven."

"I'm sorry?"

"I found seven tax write-offs." She corrected, still not looking up. Conrad grabbed her hand, forcing her to look at him.

"That's amazing. You've got such a knack for business. I don't think you realize how incredible you really are. I should have hired you at Grayson Global."

"I don't think I could work for the boss. I've heard terrible things about him." She joked.

"I heard he has his moments." Victoria smiled as she rolled her eyes, her signature move for dismissing things.

"I really am proud of you. And to do all that just to help someone else, I just-"

"I said it was nothing." Conrad couldn't stop thinking about it, but knew better than to keep pushing her.

Conrad settled on a variety platter, giving him a sample of a few signature dishes. He was surprised to learn that Victoria's "usual" was two chicken tacos and a shrimp taco. The server remembered that she preferred a side salad instead of rice and even pointed out that he added extra avocado for her. Conrad wondered if there was any man who didn't fall victim to Victoria's charms. Although he normally would be jealous, he found himself enjoying the way the men seemed to compete with one another. The server often came back to check on them but only refilled Victoria's drink. Even the busboys grabbed her plates the second she moved them towards the end of the table. Conrad wondered if they were all trying to grab the plate at the exact second so they could brush her hand. If it were him, that would be his end game.

But Victoria seemed ignorant to their ploys. Conrad wondered if she truly believed that everyone was treated the way she was. Not because of her name, but because of her beauty. As he watched her, Conrad couldn't help but wonder if she truly understood how hard he was trying to win her heart or if she assumed he was just being nice to her.


	12. Chapter 12

In the car, Conrad tried to keep his eyes on the road but kept glancing at Victoria. After all this time, she was still such a mystery.

"How did you know I like that restaurant?" She finally asked.

"How many people have you helped?" He countered. She might not have wanted to discuss it, but he was fascinated by this side of herself.

"Conrad." She said. She wasn't interested in indulging him without getting information first.

"You must have mentioned it before. I don't remember the specifics. I'm old. Now answer my question."

"With all these charity projects I don't know how many people I've helped." She fired back. "And I want to know more, because I have never mentioned it. I never took you or the kids. I only went there alone. I paid cash so it wouldn't show up on a statement."

"Why go through all the trouble to hide it?"

"Because, Conrad. Sometimes I just need a vacation from everything. I can go to there, eat a taco and be a normal person for once. Not worrying about page 6 or corporate power plays or the kids. I can just be a regular, everyday person."

Conrad sat, stunned. He had never given it much thought. He had grown up with all the luxuries he had given his wife and children. He had never known any other way to be. Victoria sighed. She didn't mean to hurt his feelings. She never meant to hurt his feelings.

"You were born into this lifestyle. I wasn't. Although I have no desire to mend things with my mother, I sometimes miss the simplicity of that way of life."

Conrad seemed to understand that explanation better than the first one, and she was relieved. Trying to keep their newfound relationship alive, she proceeded to answer his questions.

"I've made a few calls on the behalf of others. I think it feels better to help someone who can never repay me than to organize a fundraiser in order to gain the approval of Hamptons followers."

"I think it's very admirable. I wish you had told me about it earlier."

"You wouldn't have called me Ice Queen if you had known all that." She said flatly, remembering their fight a few days ago.

"No, I wouldn't." Conrad couldn't help but regret his choice of words. Even if Victoria had moved past it, he couldn't forget how broken she was. Even worse was the knowledge that he was the one responsible for her pain.

They made their way back to the hotel room. As Victoria threw her purse on the bed a thought occurred.

"You never told me how you knew about the restaurant." She assumed she knew the answer but was hoping for any other answer, knowing that she was on the verge of losing her temper.

"I try to keep close tabs on you, Victoria."

"You have me followed. Is that what you're telling me?"

"Don't overreact-" Conrad's words were interrupted by Victoria throwing a glass against the wall.

"You've been following me? For how long? What other tabs have you kept on me?"

"Yes. I've kept tabs on where you go and who you talk to. It started out as a way to ensure that you wouldn't change your mind about the David Clarke situation."

"I sacrificed him for you! How could I change my mind after that? He's gone, Conrad. You took care of that!" She couldn't believe he had the nerve to bring that up.

"You know the other reason, Victoria? Because it's easier to learn about you this way."

"Easier than what? Than talking to me? Than getting to know me?"

"Yes! It is easier. Everything is easier without your involvement. You make the easiest things complicated. I can't win with you. I can never win with you. And if I do it's only for a short amount of time and then you push people away."

Victoria couldn't believe they were back to this. No matter what happened between them, it always came back to her pushing him away. She had given him a legitimate chance, she had tried to keep him close to her and she actually enjoyed spending time with him. And the whole time he had been waiting for their demise.

"Seems we keep coming back to this. Let me help you out," Victoria said as she grabbed her purse. Conrad called out to her, but she was already gone.


	13. Chapter 13

Victoria sat in her car, surrounded by darkness. She couldn't deny the truth of her situation. Without Grayson Manor and without Conrad she was essentially alone. She hadn't wanted to bother Charlotte at the Stowaway (not that Charlotte would make time for her anyway.) And Victoria would never be desperate enough to go to Emily's cottage, even if it meant spending time with Daniel. She had many friends, but none of them Victoria really liked. They simply flocked to her because of her name. None of them were close enough that Victoria could confide in. Not since Conrad took Lydia from him.

Instead, she drove herself to a park. She originally wanted to sit on a bench outside but the breeze forced her into her car. Every few minutes her phone chimed, lighting up the entire car. Calls and texts from Conrad piled up. She didn't know why he was so worried when he clearly had someone keeping tabs on her.

She didn't know who she was more angry at, Conrad or herself. He had his faults, but she had been the one to agree to another chance. How could she have been so stupid? The worst part was how hard she had tried. It hadn't lasted more than a few days, but she had put herself on the line more than she had in the past. They had been intimate, she even initiated it while in the hot tub. She had let him pick the restaurant and although she preferred when it was a secret she hadn't refused to go in or acted out while in the restaurant. It had been a date. A really amazing date, if she were being honest with herself. But once again, Conrad squashed any chance of happiness she thought they could have.

She was understandably upset about the security detail, but she understood Conrad's need to protect her. She knew that he would never stop looking out for her, whether they were together or not. She wished she had more of a feminist attitude but she liked it. She liked the feeling that he would always protect her. What she did not like was everything that followed.

She was angry that once again he threw the "ice queen" card at her. If he thought she was so cold and hard to get to know, why try so hard to constantly win her back? She had been so warm and inviting with him earlier that day and it made no difference. Why should she keep trying if his perception of her would never change? If she looked past all her flaws then why couldn't he?

But the thing that made her angriest was that he used David Clarke against her. Again. He had a way of making her feel like a liability instead of an asset. She kept secrets that would make another person break. She had helped Conrad in his darkest times. She was more of an asset than anyone he employed and yet he never saw any of that. That was what really made her storm out.

She sighed, looking at the dark and deserted park. She knew she should go back, but she didn't know what home was anymore. She didn't think the Manor was the right place, especially with the remodeling. But was the South Fork Inn? And if she didn't belong there and with Conrad then where did she belong? And who did she belong with?


	14. Chapter 14

After three hours, Conrad called his security guy. He knew Victoria was angry, but she didn't have her purse with her. He tried to think of where she could gave gone with only her keys and cell phone, but he kept coming up empty. He waited for her to march through the door, ready for battle. But she never showed up. He tried to give her space, but it was getting late so he made the call. At first, he didn't believe what he was told so he decided to see for himself.

He noticed her car the second he turned into the park. Although her car was the only one in the empty park, he would have recognized it anywhere. He left his headlights on when he got out of the car, although he still didn't believe the information he had been given.

As he approached her car, he realized it was true. Victoria's head was tilted towards the drivers side window, her dark hair falling in different directions. Even sleeping in her car, she looked beautiful. He hated to. Wake her, but knew there was no other way. He gently tapped her window, causing her to jump. It took a second or two but she quickly remembered the fight that had brought her here.

"Leave me alone." She warned.

"Talk to me."

"I said leave me alone!" She wasn't in the mood for talking and she especially wasn't in the mood for Conrad. Instead of arguing with her, he used the spare key he kept on his key ring to open her car door. She tried to grab it but he was stronger, using his leg to keep the door opened. With a huff she got out of the car.

"I have nothing to say to you."

"I beg you, Victoria, don't do this." He wasn't ready to give up on his marriage. He wished he knew how to make her feel the same.

Victoria could feel the electricity between them although she hated to admit it. She moved away from him, leaning against the passenger door. Conrad seized the moment, shutting the door and locking it, ensuring she couldn't flee.

"You said it yourself. It's easier to do things without me, to learn about me by having me followed. That's how you found me, isn't it? You've already said that you can't win with me. I'm giving you an out, Conrad."

"Being with you is winning, Victoria. I don't want an out. I don't want to win or lose. I just want you. What I've always wanted."

"Neither of us win when we're together." She said sadly.

"Then we change it. If we fight for it we can make it work."

"It's not that simple, Conrad." He inched closer, using his arm to prop him up next to her. He was so close that she could feel his breath against her skin.

"Then we make it that simple." He kissed her tentatively, waiting to judge her reaction. She was apprehensive, but let her tongue venture into his mouth. He moved closer, pressing her against the car. He grabbed her face, pushing her closer to him.

He grabbed her leg, wrapping it around himself. His hand roamed freely under her dress, skimming the lace material of her panties. Victoria put her hand on his chest and he braced himself for rejection, but it never came. He couldn't help but imagine that her hand against his chest was her way of being able to tell herself she tried to stop him. He unzipped his pants, anxious to reclaim her. She moaned as he entered her, and he put his mouth over hers, inhaling her moans. He lifted her up, letting her wrap her arms and legs around him as he moved in and out of her. She tilted her head back, moaning as she finished. Her moan echoed through the empty park. Victoria buried her head in the crook of his neck, embarrassed.

"Don't be embarrassed." He said, gently scratching her head. He helped her down, stepping back so she could fix her dress.

"Shall we go back to our room?" He asked. He could see that she was still hesitant, but after a few minutes she slowly nodded. He unlocked her car door and watched her slide into the drivers side. Instead of starting the car, she removed the keys.

"We can send someone to pick up my car, can't we?" She asked. He tried to hide the smile as he nodded. Maybe they were on the same page after all.


	15. Chapter 15

Victoria was quiet as they drove back to the hotel. Conrad knew that she was struggling to process everything that happened. He should have been offended and yet he marveled at his wife. She was able to give in to him so easily and afterwards she silently reprimanded herself for letting anyone close to her. He wondered if it was that isolated nature that made him constantly crave her attention. It was exhausting at times, but he felt like a million bucks anytime she gave him the tiniest bit of attention.

Back in their room, she didn't need to ask him to unzip her dress. The minute she started pushing her hair to one side he approached her. He brushed the remainder of her hair to the side, letting his hand run over the back of her neck. As he unzipped the dress, his hand slid down, resting on the small of her back. He liked the mixed signals he received from her. He felt her body stiffen at his touch and yet she held her breath and he could hear the moan she was trying desperately to silence.

Victoria's mind and body were pulling her in two different directions, making her feel like she would rip in half. She wanted him desperately. She had hoped that their stunt at the park would satisfy her. Instead she was insatiable. She had spent the car ride fantasizing about all the ways she could give herself to Conrad. As a result, the smallest touch from him sent her body into overdrive.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

"I was just thinking about how excited I was to climb into bed. I thought about it the whole ride back."

Conrad smiled. He was fully aware of what Victoria really meant.

"I've been thinking about it, too. For as long as I can remember." He whispered as his hands ran along her neck and shoulders, knowing it would drive her crazy. He felt conflicted, unsure of what to do. He loved teasing Victoria, waiting until she was wound too tight to give in. On the other hand, doing so created the same effect on him. He wanted to make her wait and yet he was too impatient to do the same.

"I should get changed," she whispered. He spun her around, making her eyes grow wide.

"Don't run away. Don't hide from me."

"I'm right here."

"You know what I mean." Conrad's tone gave Victoria chills. She hated that he knew her so well, and she hated that it was such a turn on for her. She wanted to argue with him, to deny his accusations but she knew it was true.

Conrad didn't wait for her response before his lips connected with her neck. His kiss was gentle at first, trying to gauge her reaction. When she didn't move away his kiss grew hungrier, more desperate. He was fueled by the sounds of her ragged breaths. He felt her wavering, struggling to stop her knees from buckling under his touch.

He slipped her dress over her shoulders, letting it pool at her feet. He was able to easily pick her up and carry her to the bed. She didn't resist and used her feet to kick her heels off. When he laid her down she began unbuttoning the buttons on his shirt.

He hovered over her, letting her undress him slowly. He reveled in the way her dainty hands slid his shirt off him before immediately moving down to his belt. She finally looked up at him, her eyes a mixture of desire, nerves and confusion. He wanted her desperately, but he didn't want to be something she'd regret.

"Are you sure?" He asked her.

His question startled her. Had she been that transparent? She knew how badly she wanted him, but was struggling to figure out if she'd be happy with her decision in the morning. She hated that he constantly made her feel this way.

"I know what I want in this moment." She answered honestly. He laid down next to her, playing with her hair.

"You don't have to do anything-"

"I'm capable of making my own decisions, Conrad. You're not holding a gun to my head."

"I just don't want you to give in and then regret it. Again."

"Maybe if you didn't act the way you did I wouldn't constantly regret my decisions!" She snapped.

"Victoria, it wouldn't matter what I did or didn't do. Eventually you'd push me away. I constantly try to live up to your standards. I want to win you over, but I'm not perfect."

"I'm not looking for perfection!"

"Then what is it? Tell me what you want and I'll do it. I'll be whoever you need me to be, but you've got to tell me what you want."

Victoria jumped out of bed, desperate to get away from him. She was terrified by what he said. The idea that he was willing to change into whoever she needed made her heart swell, but she didn't know what she wanted. She knew she needed him but knew they'd fall back into the same patterns. Conrad was right, no matter what he said or did she would find a way to start a fight and build the walls back around herself. She desperately wanted to let him in and yet the idea was so terrifying that she'd push him further away just thinking of letting him come close.

Conrad gave her time to get out of bed. He waited while she put on a nightgown and then covered it with a robe. He knew the conversation had left her feeling vulnerable, so he let her add the layers. It was just like Victoria to cover her body the way she tried to cover her heart. It didn't bother him, her heart just like her body were worth waiting for. Once she was dressed he approached her again.

"Victoria, what do you want?"

She looked at him, then stared at the floor. She had considered his question over and over and was no closer to having an answer for him.

"I want this conversation to end."

"Victoria, again, I'm asking you what you want. You and me, what do you want?"

"I don't know. Is that what you want to hear? I have no idea what I want!" She yelled, her eyes filling with tears.


	16. Chapter 16

They sat in silence for hours. They both had gotten dressed and returned to the bed. When Conrad opened his mouth to talk, Victoria flatly said "don't." After that, he knew better than to push her. So they sat in silence.

Her mind was plagued with a million different thoughts, so much so that she didn't even quip when Conrad watched hours of Judge Judy reruns on various channels. She was angry at herself. Even with the time Conrad had given her to think about what she wanted, she had no idea. And that pissed her off. She felt like she had split personalities. She wanted Conrad, more than anything. She wanted to let go of all the pain and anger and be the married couple they pretended to be. More than anything, she wanted to be the golden couple both in from of cameras and behind closed doors.

And yet she wanted things to stay the same. She could control things this way. Through the years she had become an expert at keeping Conrad at bay. The more she denied him the harder he tried to win her over. It was easy to control him and she liked that. She liked having a normal routine and she liked being alone because there was no risk of getting hurt. She never felt vulnerable when it was just her. The problem was she couldn't be sure if she liked being with Conrad more than being alone. Being with Conrad was like walking through a minefield; She was constantly on the verge of making one wrong move and being blown into a million pieces.

Conrad was desperate to hold her, to talk to her and reason with her. He was grateful that he had the sense to make so many repairs to the manor, knowing that otherwise he would have lost her by now. He didn't know how to make things work with her. Although it hurt her, he didn't regret his comment about her picking any reason to push him away. It was true and they both knew it. He hoped her silence was her thinking of ways to prove him wrong. He was praying that her stubbornness would be enough for her to stick it out with him.

"You should get some sleep. You look exhausted." He said.

"You don't have to do that, Conrad."

"Do what?"

"Look after me all the time. I just don't want you to get the-"

"Wrong idea? Do you know how often you tell me not to get the wrong idea about things? Whether you like it or not I will always look after you. Regardless of what you think of me, I will always love and care for you. That doesn't change."

"How do you know that?" She asked, finally turning to face him.

"Know what?"

"You're always so sure of your feelings for me. How do you do that?"

"I know that nothing will ever change how I feel about you, my dear."

"I treat you terribly!" She laughed.

"Sometimes people who need love the most ask for it in the most unloving ways." She rolled her eyes at him, but there was a playfulness to it.

"I wish I had your dedication. It's admirable."

"A compliment from Queen Victoria?" He mocked, knowing she hated that nickname.

"If you're going to poke fun I take it back!"

"Oh, don't be like that," he said, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her closer. "You know, you keep saying you aren't sure what you want but I think you're just scared to admit what you want."

"Let me guess, you're my deep seeded want?"

"Just hear me out. For better or worse, you're still here. As am I. We could have thrown this away and we've made it work. Not many other people would thrive with all we've dealt with-"

"That's nothing to be proud of."

"I think in fighting for ourselves we've also fought for each other."

"We can't take credit for that. We didn't have much of a choice..." She started.

"Darling, you always had a choice. I always had a choice. The choices may have been tough, but they always existed." He said, giving her a kiss on top of her head as he rolled over to go to sleep.

Victoria sat in the darkness, her arms crossed as she wondered how accurate his statement really was.


	17. Chapter 17

"Wake up!" She snapped, turning on the light. Conrad groaned and slowly stirred. "Did you mean what you said?"

"About being tired and ready for a decent nights sleep?" He grumbled. His eyes were squinted as he struggled to adjust to the light but he could clearly see the hurt spread across Victoria's face.

"About what?" He said with a sigh.

"About each of us making our own choices."

"Yes. We both had a choice."

"You told me that we'd lose everything! I was afraid! I was protecting Daniel!" She yelled.

"I never said you made an easy choice. I said you had a choice."

"That's not fair."

"I never pretended it was."

She crossed her arms with a sigh. She hated how he made everything feel like black and white; right and wrong. They had lived their entire lives in shades of grey. When it came to her children there was never a choice. What if she had refused? If Conrad had been imprisoned would she have been charged? How would she have afforded to take care of Daniel? And Charlotte? Would David have stood behind her with that kind of public scrutiny following her? Even if he had, she knew it wouldn't have been like Conrad did. He always protected her and their family no matter the cost. It was easy for her to hate him for the despicable things he did but underneath it all, he was willing to go to the ends of the earth for her and the kids, which she appreciated.

"Victoria, can I ask you a question?"

"You just did."

"Why do you fight this so much?"

"Fight what?"

"Us. Me."

"Conrad-"

"I mean it. After all this time I'm still here. You're still here. And yet there is so much distance-"

"So that's my fault?!"

"We're both to blame. But I'm willing to work on it. I'm willing to fight for you."

"And I'm not?"

"When, my dear. When have you worked on it? When have you fought for us? For me?"

"I chose you, Conrad! I took the witness stand and testified against David. I helped you steal his laptop. I helped you ruin his life!"

"You did that for you! For Daniel. Your back was against the wall. You did not do it because you were in love with me and wanted to be with me."

Victoria was stunned. He was right. She never put an effort into their marriage. She never worked on the relationship. She never fought for him.

"You're right. I'm sorry." She whispered. "Where do we go from here?"

"That depends." He said.

"On what?"

"On whether you're ready to fight for us."


	18. Chapter 18

Victoria sighed. This was not going well. Her morning jog had been plagued with the words Conrad had spoken last night. She knew it was true. In their entire relationship she had never made an effort. She had never truly fought for him and yet she expected him to fight for her. Last night he had asked if she was ready to fight for him and she hasn't answered. She knew she hurt him but she needed to be certain. She was thankful he didn't wake up to jog with her and had used the time to try and focus on what she really wanted. She still wasn't positive that she wanted Conrad, but she knew that she didn't want his absence.

As she raced back towards the inn she pulled out her cell phone. Unsure of what her next step would be, she googled "how to make your husband fall in love with you again." She clicked on a how-to article, but closed it when she saw the first step. Being nice. She rolled her eyes as she slid the phone back into her pocket. This was going to be harder than she expected.

She crept back into the suite, amazed that Conrad was still asleep. She utilized her time, taking a long shower. As she was finishing up, an idea hit.

Conrad wasn't surprised to wake up alone. Hurt, yes. Surprised, no. He had a suspicion that Victoria had raced to the airport, taking a one way flight anywhere in the world. He knew she wouldn't fight for him and yet he was powerless to stop the words from falling. In reality, as much as it hurt that she didn't put in an effort, it certainly never deterred him. He kind of appreciated having to work to pull pieces of Victoria out of her isolation. It made it seem worth it when he was successful. Every smile, every kiss, every kind word was like a grand prize. She was a grand prize. She was the only prize.

He noticed her purse was still on the table and breathed a sigh of relief. She was probably just on one of her long jogs. He entertained different notions of things he could do to make up for the tense discussion last night. He hadn't gotten many ideas down when he heard the keycard in the door.

Victoria stood in the doorway, wearing a long beige trench coat. Her ebony curls fell down towards the small knot that tied the coat shut. She slowly pushed a silver serving cart into the room.

"Victoria, what is this?" He asked. She pulled the silver dome off the top of the plate. "Eggs Benedict. You're favorite breakfast, right?"

"How on Earth?"

"I know what you like, Conrad." She stated matter of factly.

"Did you need a coat for that or did you make a mess trying to cook this yourself?" He asked. The deep roar of laughter proved his initial thought. She did not cook his breakfast. He breathed a sigh of relief knowing that the food was in better hands had she not cooked it. She slowly untied the coat, letting it fall in a pool at her feet. She stood inches from the bed in a lacy black teddy with clasps on her thigh hooking the lacy black stockings.

"Like I said, I know what you like." She said. He stared at her dumbfounded for a moment. "I heard you last night, Conrad. I'm willing to fight for you. I just thought I could also make up with you..." He could tell from the subtle changes in her posture that she was getting nervous, which only made her more irresistible to him. Did she have any idea of how beautiful she truly was?

"I'm not sure which to devour first." He growled and he inched towards her.

"The eggs first. That part was fighting for you."

"Why does that equal eggs first?"

"It's fight and makeup. In that other. Honestly, Conrad everyone knows that." She said, sitting in the chair. She crossed her legs slowly, teasing him with a sneak peak of what was to come.

He ate quickly, his eyes never leaving her. It surprised her how much she enjoyed fighting for Conrad. She enjoyed the way he looked at her and gave her goosebumps. She enjoyed the surprise and excitement in his voice when he realized that she remembered something so trivial about him.

He moved quickly after eating, clearing the silver cart into the hallway. He wanted to put her on it and wheel her to the bed for him to devour next, but he knew the metal would be cold and uncomfortable. He wanted her to enjoy it as much as him. Maybe even more.

He tossed her on the bed, quickly capturing her lips in a heated kiss. Her mouth immediately opened, granting him access. He ran his hands along her legs, surprised by how ready she already was for him. Maybe he underestimated her when she said she would fight for him.

He pushed into her harder than he usually did. She not only embraced it, she held onto him tightly, pushing him even further into her. He pinned her hands above her head as he left a trail of kisses across her neck and down her collarbone. She moaned louder than she had before, but still quiet enough that it didn't feel rehearsed. He closed his eyes, listening to her ragged breathing. His hands held her hips as she met his rhythm. He waited until he felt her body shudder underneath him until he emptied himself into her.

After she regained her breath she headed for the bathroom.

"Not so fast," he said grabbing her waist and pulling her into him.

"What are you doing?" She asked as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her closer than she normally allowed.

"I'm cuddling with you." He said. After a few seconds she relaxed in his embrace. He left small kisses on her head, on her shoulder and he neck. This never happened. He was about to release her when he heard the deep breathing. Victoria had let herself enjoy it enough to fall asleep in her arms.

Conrad didn't care whether she fought for him or let him fight her. A simple moment like this was all he needed to know that she was the only thing he wanted.


	19. Chapter 19

It had been almost an hour and he still couldn't take his eyes off of her. Her dark hair splashed along the ivory pillowcase and her eyes fluttered from side to side, even in her sleep. Since falling asleep in his arms she had barely moved, but the blanket only covered half of her now. He wanted to cover her up, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Instead, he watched her and prayed that every detail would be engrained into his memory. He watched her chest rise and fall. With every breath her nightgown seemed to dip lower and he prayed a small portion of her would become exposed but her body knew better than to go against her. The hem of her nightgown had crept up so he had the slightest glimpse of her lacy panties underneath. He was torn. He wanted her to sleep, to be calm in his arms. But he also wanted her.

Unable to resist her anymore, he slid out of the bed, moving to the other side. Victoria rolled so she was lying on her back but didn't wake up. He was grateful for her readjustment because he was able to leave soft kisses up her leg. She moaned softly but didn't wake. He wondered how far he could get before she realized she wasn't dreaming.

He let his hand dip into her. Even though she didn't wake her body reacted to his touch. He let his hand move over her most intimate spots but she still didn't wake.

He pressed his mouth to her as he licked, kissed and nipped at her. Her moans grew louder until she slowly came to. Instead of asking any questions she moved her hips to his rhythm, giving him a chance to grab her hips and push her against him, letting him go even deeper.

It didn't take long until he felt her tightening around him. He let go, giving her a chance to catch her breath as he moved back to the side of the bed.

"What was that for?" She asked.

"I couldn't wait. I wanted you." He said so matter of factly that she didn't ask questions.

She watched as he turned on the tv, crossing an arm behind his head as if nothing had happened.

"So that's it? You're just going to watch tv?" She asked.

"I'm just giving you a break."

"A break for what?" He turned to her, clearly amused by her confusion.

"You said we were making up. We've got an awful lot to make up for. You might want to grab some water or a bite to eat. I'm nowhere near being done with you." He purred.


	20. Chapter 20

Victoria pushed herself forward to kiss Conrad, but he grabbed her wrists and pulled her up.

"Oh, no. You're going to do the work." He teased.

"What?"

"No need to be bashful or self conscious, you never were before. We both know you're a tiger, show me those stripes!"

He didn't know why she got so shy about her body. She was a knockout and it amazed him to think that she might not know it.

He shouldn't have tempted her because she took him up on his offer. She lowered herself down on him and moved at a slow pace, but pleasing and teasing him. He was grabbing at her hips, desperate for her to move faster but she didn't give in. She stretched it out until he couldn't contain himself anymore. She let herself collapse on top of him for a few moments, both trying to catch her breath.

"I should jump in the shower," she whispered. He knew it wasn't personal, Victoria would not stand for being sweaty, even under the pretense of romance.

He watched her walk off towards the bathroom completely naked. It didn't take long for him to follow her into the bathroom. In one swift move he had her lifted and pressed against the bathroom door. She wrapped herself around him, giving him more access. His lips were all over her, sending her further over the edge.

"Now I really need to take a shower," she giggled as she started the water. Before she headed in, she grabbed his hand and lead him into the shower for another round.

Conrad hadn't even tied his robe when he felt Victoria's small hands on him.

"My dear, you're wearing me out."

"You said we were making up for last time!" She shrieked, embarrassed at the idea of being more sexually aggressive than him.

"That isn't the problem. I just haven't taken up jogging like you have."

"That's hardly my problem!" She said, suddenly feeling defensive.

"Don't be like that. I just thought we could order lunch first."

"Actually, lunch does sound really good right about now." She said as she made herself comfortable on the bed.


	21. Chapter 21

After lunch he climbed into bed, nuzzling into the crook of her neck. He forgot how irresistible she smelled.

Victoria pretended not to notice the non chalet way he inched closer, squeezing her tightly, but not too tight. Victoria had already thought of a devious way to ensure he'd regret asking for a cool down time. Of course, she'd help herself in the process.

He kissed her, quickly moving on top of her, eager to pick up where they had left off. She lead him on, letting him kiss and touch her, knowing she'd get her revenge soon enough.

He was just about to plunge into her when she grabbed him firmly by the shaft.

"Oh, no, no, no. You needed a break, remember?" She said, a mischievous smile creeping on her face.

He didn't know what to think. She wasn't angry, but he knew she was up to something. He was stupid to think that she wouldn't find some way to torture him.

Instead of refusing him, Victoria decided to go a different route. After all, why should she be punished for his behavior.

She used his member to her advantage, rubbing it against her. He shuddered under her touch, the softness of her skin mixed with the force she was using. To add salt to the wound, she arched her back, moaning into his ear. Conrad couldn't tear his eyes away from Victoria. The way she writhed underneath him. The way her face contoured in pleasure. Although she had denied him, he was about to explode. She pressed even harder, using rubbing him against her until she let herself go.

Conrad stared at her, dumbfounded. He didn't get anything out of it and yet it may have been the most erotic thing he had ever experienced.


	22. Chapter 22

She knew she was in trouble. Her entire jog it plagued her mind. The night before she had ambushed Conrad, worked the element of surprise. She knew that he would retaliate and she had no choice but to sit and wait for it. This morning, he declined her offer to go for her morning jog with her and she knew she was in for it when she came home. Since they'd taken up residence at South Fork Inn he'd gone sign her every day, constantly worried that something would happen to her.

Except today.

She walked painfully slow back to the hotel, trying to think of a plan of action. It wasn't her best plan, but she knew what she had to do. She had tortured him by not letting him get his release. That was what he'd be after, teasing her with orgasms he had no intention of giving her. That's why she had to stop herself. She knew nothing would drive him crazier than her holding out on him. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before going into the room. She promised herself she would not give in to him at any cost.

She made small talk with him before hopping in the shower to clean off. She jumped, but wasn't surprised when she turned around to find Conrad standing behind her.

"Coming to exact revenge?" She raised an eyebrow, letting him know she knew what he was doing.

"You should know that I'm a lover, not a fighter."

"Mmm..." she whispered in mock agreement before turning her attention back to the shower.

He grabbed her waist and pulled her out of the stream of water, kissing her neck.

"I couldn't get you out of my mind last night. That thing you did..." Conrad had no ulterior motives. He had never experienced anything as arousing as Victoria using him to find her release.

Victoria assumed he was trying to turn her on and leave her high and dry. She was not falling for that. Instead, she turned the water off and reached past him, grabbing the towel.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"I'd like to dry off," she replied before stepping out of the shower. This was going to be a lot harder than she thought.

He followed her like a puppy, desperate for any shred of attention she'd throw his way. He knew she was hesitant but he couldn't figure out why. She had been fine earlier. They'd been getting along for a few days.

"What is wrong?" Conrad asked. "You've been acting different all day. Did I do something?"

She sighed, growing impatient.

"I am not in the mood for whatever perverted games you had in mind. You are giving me a headache today."

"Victoria, I didn't..."

"You never do. Please let me rest. It's the least you could do after keeping me hostage in this hotel room." She scuffed. She immediately saw the hurt look on his face and regretted her words, but she didn't have a chance to say another word before he excused himself and told her to feel better.

Victoria should have been happy. She won. She didn't give in to him. But she felt terrible. She had broken his heart for what? Victory? She didn't feel very victorious. She had lied to Conrad about her migraine, but now her head really was pounding. What had she done?


End file.
